Allie

On Avoiding Sugar

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So I decided I’d like to lose some weight. I’ve been exercising consistently for awhile now (more on that in a later post) and although I’m seeing results in the mirror, I wasn’t seeing them on the scale. Normally, I’m not a dieter. The very thought makes me want to do burpees. I hate burpees. But I thought, just as an experiment more than anything, I’d try avoiding sugar for about three weeks in April. Nothing too drastic. I think I might have lost a pound or two, but I learned some interesting things. Here are some of them:

Sugar is in everything

Okay, maybe not everything. But seriously. I was only avoiding sugar and other added sweeteners, but I swear, it’s almost impossible to avoid added sugar unless you are also avoiding carbs, dairy, and processed foods, just to name a few. I actually had considered doing a Whole 30, a program that a friend of mine had recommended. I chickened out on that and just avoided sugar instead, but it turns out that’s harder than I thought it would be. If I ever try this again, I’m going to go with the carb-counting method I learned from my nutrition consultation when I had gestational diabetes, or just suck it up and do the Whole 30.

Sugar makes me sick

Not even kidding. On one Sunday morning, after I’d been avoiding sugar for about a week, I accidentally ate two cookies out of habit. About 30 minutes later, I felt terrible. Heart rate went wacky, stomach felt icky, and I got a headache. Then went I went back to eating sugar on my daughter’s birthday, I overloaded and believe me, I felt it. Clearly my body doesn’t handle it well. Sadly, I know that and I just keep eating the stuff anyway.

Some things actually taste good without sugar

First, I should probably confess that although I significantly reduced my sugar intake, I also increased one of my other guilty pleasures: butter. I love butter. Possibly more than sugar. Yes, I realize that eating more butter probably balanced out eating less sugar, and could be the reason I didn’t lose more than a pound or two, but I just kept telling myself that butter was better for me than sugar anyway. So I ate it on toast. Smeared it on pancakes and covered that with strawberries (yes I know pancakes have sugar. I checked the label. See? Everything has sugar) I cooked stuff in it. And it was delicious. Believe me, if a little butter is good, more butter is better.

Okay, enough about butter. I drink a lot of coffee. With creamer and flavored syrup and yes, sometimes whipped cream. All the good stuff. Well, I wasn’t about to give up coffee – I’ve tried that, with disastrous consequences – but I was good and didn’t put sugar in it. Sometimes I drank it black. I can do that. I like coffee. Sometimes I did put milk in it. And half and half. See what I mean about dairy? It’s a problem. But anyway, I discovered that plain, unsweetened lattes are actually really tasty. So now I’ll have my grande hazelnut latte with just one pump of syrup instead of three or four and guess what? It still tastes like an indulgent treat. A little bit of heaven. Happiness in a cup.

I also learned that plain yogurt isn’t actually that nasty. Especially if you put raspberries or blueberries and a teeny dribble of vanilla in it. Or a teaspoon honey. Strictly speaking, honey is an added sweetener (read: sugar) but it sure does make yogurt palatable. And we get honey from a local guy who has his own bees, not the fake crap from the grocery store. So there. Anyway, just today I had some yogurt with raspberries and honey, and I didn’t gag.

Also, homemade Chex Mix is really, really good.

Talking about what I’m not eating makes people uncomfortable

So much of our social interaction revolves around food. I gave up sugar and suddenly people were apologizing for eating it or making stuff with it, or asking me if I’d like dessert and then looking all guilty when I said no. I just wanted to make a sign that says “Please excuse me if my personal food choices are making you feel bad. Get over it.” Instead, I decided that if I ever go on any kind of diet again (somewhat unlikely) I’m not going to tell people about it. It’s just more trouble than it’s worth. So yeah, maybe I’ll just eat the brownie at the potluck. It’s not gonna kill me. It’s kind of like when the Apostle Paul talks about food in 1 Corinthians 8. Do what you have to do. But don’t throw it in people’s faces. Be kind, and gracious, and let other people eat what they want. It’s a good approach to food, and to life.

So much for my brief excursion into dieting. Even if it was short and rather limited. My biggest conclusion? I actually don’t eat that much sugar. I could eat less. But there’s a reason why I’d rather exercise. I love food. All the food. That is all.

On The Avengers: Age of Ultron

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Just like pretty much everyone else in America, I saw the new Avengers movie this week. And now, for your entertainment, I present my spoiler-free take on the film.

First of all, if you can, go with friends. Movies are just more fun with friends. I’d say this is a good date movie but I’m not sure what that means. As with most movies, Greg grudgingly went along with me to see it because he knew I would never let him hear the end of it if he didn’t go. In his defense, he does like the Avengers. We also went with three other friends. The great thing about seeing Marvel movies with friends is that they are funny movies, and it’s fun to laugh with friends. I mean, I don’t know about you, but that’s pretty much why I have friends. Right? Also, I like to talk about movies after seeing them, which is much more enjoyable if you’re with a group and you’ve all just seen the same movie together. Bonus points if you or at least a couple of your friends are some level of Marvel geek, because then you can have heated discussions about things like Civil Wars and Infinity Stones and explain minute points that either everyone already knows or no one cares about. And more bonus points if you get more than one funny look from the server at the restaurant you go to hang out at after the movie.

So anyway. The Avengers. Quick synopsis: The volatile crew of superheroes known as the Avengers (or as Greg likes to call them, the league of beautiful people) is working to recover Loki’s nasty scepter that caused so much trouble in the last movie. This becomes a problem, we eventually figure out why, there’s lots of drama, interpersonal relationship stuff, and a freaky mean sentient robot who decides that the Avengers are the world’s sickness and he knows the cure. Which is, of course, destroy the world (and humanity along with it). Since the Avengers are known for being rather fond of the earth (and humanity along with it), they figure they’d better stop him. It’s not a perfectly constructed, watertight plot by any means, but it provides a good backdrop for all the fun superhero antics that everyone is really there to see. That and the beautiful people. Because let’s face it, these people are superhumanly gorgeous. Eye candy, fun one-liners, and a really obnoxious villain who just needs a good butt-kicking are the essential elements of this film, and they deliver. I will leave the sarcastic criticism of various plot elements to the people of YouTube (HISHE, Screen Junkies, Cinema Sins, take your pick, there’s a bunch of them and they rule the Internet) and just say yes, it’s a fun movie. No, it’s not as good as the first Avengers movie, which is on my list of all-time favorite movies. No, it will not win any Oscars. And really, who cares? Marvel knows exactly how to part millions of us with our money: Keep making movies like this. It works.

On Being the Master of My Domain

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As I’m sure you all know, I’m naturally a humble, unassuming person, even quiet and shy at times. (And if you really know me, you’ll know there is some sarcasm in that statement, too. But it’s mostly true. Or partially true. Sometimes) But there are times in life when it becomes necessary to say, Hey look at me! I’m awesome! For me, this is one of those moments. Because I have registered a domain name. See it there at the top of the page? www.allisonduke.com. See it? Awesome, right? Now all I need is an awesome website to go with it. And maybe something to sell. Like a book, or editing services, or something like that. Oh and maybe I should blog more often. Yeah. That would be good.

So there you go. Tell all your friends. And if anyone wants to volunteer to help me figure out the awesome website part, please email me or comment below. 🙂

On the Past

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I’ve been thinking a lot about past events lately. For lots of reasons, not all of them good, but not all of them bad, either. I’ve also considered writing a memoir – crazy, I know, but all kinds of people are writing memoirs lately and it sounds fun. The past is a tricky thing. People say don’t live in it, don’t waste your time regretting it, what’s done is done…the fact is, what’s done is done, and there’s not a lot we can do about it now. So if we can’t change the past, which is true, and we shouldn’t dwell in it, which is also true, why can’t we just forget about it and move on? Is it possible that we’re not meant to?

Memories are fascinating. They are not always accurate. They are colored by our impressions of the circumstances, the people involved, our moods, either when the memory was created or recalled. And so the past becomes this vast subjective thing, where conversations and events are altered through our interpretations and impressions, either true or false. Very often, memories of the past are tainted with regret. I should have made a better choice. I wish I’d known then what I know now. What if I had done something or said something differently? Could I have done more? Should I have done less?

Then there are the parts of the past that we’d just rather not think about. Dark old secrets, the kind that lay buried most of the time, but sometimes bits and pieces show up, not always at the most convenient times. What do we do with them? Try to forget them? Wish they had never happened? For what it’s worth, here’s the perspective I’ve gained this week:

The failures of the past are more than just errors in judgment that we wish we could forget. As a believer in Christ, cleansed by his blood, I am forgiven of all those mistakes, and even the intentional sins I’ve committed. But I still remember them, even though sometimes I wish I could forget. Why? Because those things have shaped who I am today. There is no point in wishing they had never happened. I am forgiven, I’ve moved on, but in that process, my life and my character were changed. There was most likely an impact in others’ lives that they’ll never forget, either. We do this life thing together, and in some way, every choice we make changes our lives and the lives of people around us, in good ways and bad ways, for all eternity. That knowledge makes me want to live better in the future, make better choices now, so that the impact I leave on the lives of others is positive, not detrimental.

We can’t change the past. We can let it change us. Make us better, wiser, more forgiving of others’ mistakes. And when those things do pop up and we remember them, we can also remember where we came from, where we are now, and find reasons to be thankful for the blessings in our lives, both now and in the past. Most of all, I am thankful for the grace of God that covers my past, redeems it, and makes me new.

Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert. (Isaiah 43:19, ESV)

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.  (2 Corinthians 5:17, ESV)

On Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

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Okay, for those of you who don’t know, I’m just going to come out and say it: I’m a nerd. As a nerd, I consider myself a generalist in all things nerdy. But I do geek out in certain areas. One of them is the Marvel Cinematic Universe, or MCU. I just loved the idea of so many storylines tying together across several movies. I got totally into it. And then, after The Avengers, one of my favorite movies because it’s just so much fun, came the ABC TV series, Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. For the purposes of this blog, I’m just going to call it SHIELD. It’s on a brief winter hiatus right now, but I saw a sneak peek of the next episode and I’m so excited, I just keep thinking about it. So here’s a blog post about it.

I’ve watched this show since the first episode, and haven’t missed one. I’ve even watched all the Marvel movies that have come out since this show debuted, in order to make sure I don’t accidentally miss something important. I know some people were disappointed that the show has its own plot and doesn’t really tie in to the movies very tightly. As one of my friends put it, “I kind of lost interest when I realized that it’s not really about the Avengers, just some people who sort of know them.” But as the Marvel folks like to say, it’s all connected. I think it’s totally fun to set this show in a world where the Avengers really do exist and the events that happen in major cinematic productions also affect the lives of the “ordinary” people who make up Coulson’s team of agents. And yes, the show does focus on Phil Coulson, Nick Fury’s right-hand-man, who died so dramatically in the Avengers. And yes, he did die. And yes, he’s alive now. It’s a long story, and one that weaves through the plot of most of the first season. The series premiere poses the question, “What really happened to Coulson?” that gets slowly but surely explored through the course of the season. Along the way, we are introduced to a fun, engaging cast of characters. From the feisty and mysterious Skye, to the nerdy scientist duo, FitzSimmons, to hardened agents Melina May and Grant Ward, Coulson’s crew proves over and over that a good team is greater than the sum of its parts. And that learning to work together often serves to bring out the best – and the worst – in people.

I think this show has great writing, decent acting, and a lot of really fun action and explosions and special effects and stuff. In fact, to skip ahead for a second, the winter finale of this season included some of the best special effects I’ve seen in a TV series. Admittedly, I don’t watch a lot of TV. But still, it was awesome. But the real strength of the show is the characters and their chemistry. During the first season, I loved watching the bond that developed between Skye and Coulson, the fun interaction between Fitz and Simmons, and the questionable relationships between May and Ward and the other characters. It took a few episodes for all that chemistry to really start to come together, but once it did and I really started to care about the people in the show, I was totally hooked. It’s also fun to see occasional Asgardians and cameos from characters in the Marvel movies, and I hope to see more of those in the future.

I think most people would agree that the real shining moments for this show happened after the events of Captain America: The Winter Soldier. Suddenly the plot that had been developing all season had a real focus, and specific enemies, including a brilliant betrayal. The season finale of the show was packed with angst, awesomeness, and fantastic one-liners delivered with the crackling wit I’ve come to expect from Marvel writers and actors. It was like a Marvel movie condensed into an hour and delivered on the small screen. I loved it, and I loved how it set up the second season, which has been excellent. Although Coulson is still the focus, Skye is also coming into her own, and the show has now shifted somewhat in tone. Instead of just reacting to the Marvel movies, it seems fairly obvious that the show is now building to at least one of them (Inhumans) and possibly more (Captain America: Civil War…?) It’s a bold move by the studio but I think it’s super fun. I’m eagerly anticipating the show’s return on March 3, and trying to keep up with Agent Carter (which is also a fun show) in the meantime.

I’m slightly obsessed with SHIELD. My obsession has inspired internet research, long conversations peppered with exclamation points, and even a mild temptation to actually read comic books – okay, I’ve resisted that so far. But if you like Marvel movies, or TV shows with action and really good character development, I think you’ll like this show. I don’t have Netflix or Hulu but I think season one is on Netflix and season two is on Hulu Plus, so you should have time to binge-watch and catch up before new shows start up in March. Do it. Thank me later. And talk to me later, because I do not get tired of talking about this show.

On Friendship

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Through an interesting set of circumstances, I’ve recently had an opportunity to evaluate some of my closest friendships, and I’ve learned some things. About life, about friends, and about my friends, in particular.  I think some of it is worth sharing.

I’m not a particularly outgoing person. I used to consider myself an introvert and I suppose that’s still true to some extent, although I like people much better now than I once did. I was very shy growing up, and being homeschooled didn’t give me much of an opportunity to break out of my shell. It wasn’t until after college, when I started my Mary Kay business, that I finally realized that I actually like people. Still, I’ve never had a huge group of friends. I tend to have a small handful of people that I know and trust, a larger circle of friends I genuinely enjoy spending time with, and then plenty of acquaintances who I’ll smile and chitchat with, but who really don’t know me at all. Most of those people tend to think I’m sweet. My friends know better. My close friends really know me, and love me anyway. At least, that’s how I see it.

I find that in life it’s helpful to think the best of people, but not trust them too much. Still, most of the time I’d rather err on the side of trust. There are times I regret that. But I’d rather love people and have real relationships where I might get hurt than put up walls and be fake. To me, that doesn’t sound like any kind of life. Anyway, here’s what I’ve learned about true friends:

A true friend is a friend all the time. Good times, bad times, fun times, hard times. A true friend knows my faults, maybe not all of them but most of them, but doesn’t fault me for them. A true friend will listen to me go on and on for hours or maybe even days, or sometimes even longer, about what is going on in my life. Even after I say, “Ok, now I’m done. Oh wait, one more thing…” A true friend will listen to my secrets and my fears and keep them quiet. A true friend will have my back when times get tough. A true friend is honest. A true friend won’t tell me “oh, you’re fine, everything will be okay” when it’s obvious that I’m not, and it won’t. A true friend won’t tell me what to do unless I actually ask for advice. A true friend is willing to let me make my own mistakes, pray me through them, and be there for me afterward without the obvious but belittling “I told you so.” True friends can have fun doing little stupid stuff, and big fun stuff, laugh at a gazillion inside jokes, and talk about nothing or important things anytime, for hours if necessary. A true friend has the courage to correct me in person, rather than going behind my back.

I have discovered that I may have fewer true friends than I thought, but I am so thankful for the ones I have. I hope that I am always the kind of friend I hope to have in my life. Because when the hard times do come, and they always will, it’s good to have a few good friends.

On Christmas Music

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So far this year, nothing makes me feel more grinchy than Christmas music on the radio. I love Christmas, and I love Christmas music. Well, most of it. There are a few songs that I just don’t like, and most of them would fall into the category of “Christmas classics.” The worst of these offenders is that old-timey hit from Burl Ives, Holly Jolly Christmas. Every time the fuzzy-vinyl recording starts up (which is every time I have the radio on in the car, even if I’m just driving ten minutes to the grocery store) I have to turn it off. Even my four-year-old daughter knows I hate that song. She asked me about it the other day.

This is not a rant against the secularization or commercialization of Christmas. It’s nothing as anti-cultural or sanctimonious as that. This is all about my personal preference. One of the Christian radio stations I listen to starts playing non-stop Christmas music at the beginning of November, and the other one I listen to started it last weekend. And when it comes to Christian contemporary music, these stations have a good thirty years of songs to pick from. There are always several new Christmas albums from Christian artists that come out every year. So why is it that just because it’s Christmas, they feel the need to suddenly start playing these seasonal classics that have nothing to do with Christ? If I wanted to listen to mainstream Christmas music, including those awful vinyl recordings of Silver Bells and White Christmas as well as stupid newer songs like All I Want For Christmas Is You, I could listen to a mainstream station. They’re playing all those songs, too.

Holly Jolly Christmas isn’t the only song I turn off every time I hear it. There are “Christian” Christmas songs that I hate, too. Christmas Shoes and Happy Birthday Jesus come to mind. Like I said, it’s not really about the content of the lyrics, it’s just about what I like and what I don’t. I know, I should just make a Christmas mix CD for my car (yeah, it doesn’t have an MP3 player option) and make my own playlist to listen to at home and just stop whining. But hey, I have a blog, and that’s what blogs are for, right? And sometimes I get bored with my own music selections, too.

Who’s with me? Who else wants to turn on a Christian radio station and just hear Christmas music, no matter what time of year it is? Any other musical grinches out there?

On THE HUNGER GAMES by Suzanne Collins

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So here’s a lesson in life: Don’t swear that you’ll never do something. Because then if you do it, you’ll feel kind of stupid. I swore repeatedly that I would never read The Hunger Games or its sequels, Catching Fire and Mockingjay. I had perfectly good reasons for not wanting to read them. They’re dystopian, and I’m not a fan of the genre. I’ve only read a few dystopians and I haven’t liked any of them. They’re written in first person present tense, a writing style that I find extremely annoying. And worst of all, they break my rule: don’t mess with kids. For those reasons and probably a few others, I shrugged them off and said I wouldn’t read them. And then I read them.

Why did I read them? Well, people kept talking about them, and the movies, and they’ve pretty much become a cultural icon, and I was tired of feeling out of the loop. I’d heard enough about them that I figured I pretty much knew how they went, but I was intrigued by this tough, arrow-shooting female protagonist, Katniss Everdeen. And there’s the fact that they’ve quickly become one of those standard series that other Young Adult books are compared to and judged by, and since I write YA, I figured I ought to go ahead and see what all the fuss was about.

With such high expectations going in, I can say that although I didn’t like the trilogy, I didn’t hate it as much as I thought I would. Many people that I’ve talked to devoured all three books in a week or less. I checked them out through Amazon’s Prime Owners Lending Library, which is limited to one book a month. Even at that, it took me four or five months to get through all three of them. They are emotionally draining, and sometimes I could guess (more or less accurately) what was going to happen next, and I just didn’t want to read it. But finally, with Mockingjay Part 1 out in theaters this week, there was enough buzz going around that I picked Mockingjay back up, after setting it aside about a third of the way through, and finished it.

My issues with the book are pretty much what I expected. The setting of Panem, a dismal, post-apocalyptic nation of oppressed Districts ruled by a pleasure-loving, totally corrupt Capitol, is not a place where you expect good things to happen. And for the most part, they don’t. The writing style is compelling, but I’m not comfortable reading in first person present tense, and I don’t know that the author was completely comfortable writing in it, either. It slips into past tense frequently as Katniss revisits memories or events that happened earlier in the day. It interrupts the flow of the story and can come across as jarring, and anytime the writing does that, for any reason, I find it annoying. And of course, the premise is awful. Obviously this is a screwed up society, and the more you read the more you realize just how screwed up it really is. But basically the Hunger Games are a form of child sacrifice, where the Capitol forces each of the twelve Districts to offer up two kids between the age of 12 and 17 to kill each other off in an arena rigged with various horrors until only one survives and is declared the victor. The games are televised with great pomp and ceremony, so that every resident of Panem is basically forced to watch this horrible event take place every year.

At the beginning of the story, Katniss volunteers to take her sister’s place in the games. We then get to experience the lead-up and the games themselves, plus all the aftermath, through her perspective. I wanted to like Katniss, I really did. She does have a very naturally humble, self-sacrificing aspect to her personality combined with a certain magnetism that somehow inspires people to adore her, despite the fact that she’s also an abrasive, anti-social, lost soul. So despite really wanting to like her, I never did. She has moments of extreme selfishness. She tends to act and think like the entire world revolves around her, and she’s surprisingly clueless about things that should be fairly obvious. The fact that she’s very human and pretty flawed makes her a sympathetic character, easy to relate to, but not quite a hero. She is young, and she experiences things that would probably destroy anyone, so it’s not surprising that as the story goes along she unravels. One of my friends pointed out that she clearly suffers from extreme PTSD. She’s also hopelessly naive. She allows people to use and manipulate her for their own ends until almost the end of the story, when she finally decides she’s had enough, and takes matters into her own hands in a way that anyone could have seen coming.

Ultimately, I reconciled myself to moderately liking these books because in the end, the author states the very thing that bothers me about the whole story: A society that sacrifices its children for power or entertainment or to end a war is fundamentally flawed, and certainly not a place where any sane person would want to live. No one comes through the story whole and healthy. So many people die. Many of them are children. At times it’s deeply disturbing to read. In fact, I find it slightly horrifying that it’s written for “young adults,” or in other words, teenagers. I know there is worse, more graphic stuff out there, and that kids these days are probably used to that sort of thing, but it bothered me. It really shows a lot of what’s bad about people, the horrible things we could be capable of if we allow our own culture to continue down the path we’re on. There’s a lot of the dark depth of human nature in these stories, without very much of the light of God’s glory and grace. I know they’re not Christian books so I didn’t expect to find much of that anyway, but in my opinion, the best stories still reveal the truth of God, and the image of God in the human beings He created. I’m not sure these books ever get there.

I haven’t seen the movies. Of course, I swore I wouldn’t. Now I’m not so sure, but at any rate I can’t comment on how the movies are the same or different or whatever. I’ve heard from several people who think the movies are better, that Katniss is more heroic, that some of the other characters aren’t quite as passive as they seem to be in the books. At this point, I’m not going to recommend seeing the movies or reading the books. I read them, I didn’t hate them, but I’m glad I’m done with them and I never have to read them again. That is all.

On Why I Love Scrivener

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It occurs to me that I should have posted this at the beginning of November, for anyone attempting to write an entire novel during National Novel Writing Month, although if you are a NaNo participant, you may be eligible for special offers this month. I didn’t discover Scrivener until after my first NaNoWriMo journey. I wish I had known about it then, and I’m definitely glad I have it now, as I prepare for a rewrite that is going to require rearranging several scenes, deleting some, and adding new ones.

Scrivener is a writing software, available for both Windows and Mac, at literatureandlatte.com. Unlike a regular word processor, it allows me to write my novel in chunks (I call them scenes) rather than in one long file. It eliminates the annoying need to scroll forever through a multipage document when I realize I made a typo in the middle of say, chapter 12. It’s much easier than cut and paste if I decide that a scene I put at the end of chapter 10 really would go better at the beginning of chapter 11. It also allows me to keep notes, research, and deleted scenes all in the same project file rather than searching my computer for that piece of backstory or that scene I deleted and now decided I want to put back in.

Here are some of my favorite Scrivener features:

  • There is a handy search function, so that when I realized in a read-through that I use some form of the word “irritating” too much, I could list all the spots where I used it and edit them.
  • The Project Targets, which shows a total word count for the project as well as my current session, and gives me red, yellow, and green bars to tell me how close I am to my targets. Statistics also give interesting information like an approximate page count and how many times certain words are used.
  • The ability to Snapshot the current version of a scene before editing it. That way, if I make a change I’m not certain about and then I decide I don’t like it, I can just Rollback to the previous version with a click, or cut and paste bits and pieces out of previous versions. Scrivener saves as it goes, so this is one way to keep a log of previous versions of scenes.
  • The extremely valuable Compile function, which allows me to compile all of my manuscript, or just parts of it, into various file formats. So if I want to send a PDF of my latest chapter to a reader, no problem. If I want to compile the entire thing to archive it before a major edit, done. I can create a Word file and touch that up for submission to an agent or publisher. And my latest, most exciting discovery: I can create a .mobi file and read my own book on my Kindle, or send it to beta readers in that format if they want.

In my opinion, writers are much better off using writing software than word processors to create their manuscripts. Word processors have their place, but since Scrivener can compile into a .rtf file, why not wait until the manuscript is complete and then use the word processor for final editing and formatting? I haven’t even taken advantage of all the amazing features Scrivener offers. It has different templates for novels, non-fiction, scripts, etc. It’s not very expensive, and adding the license to multiple computers is simple, so once you’ve bought it you shouldn’t have to ever purchase it again. I know there are other software options out there. I tried several before choosing Scrivener several years ago, and I’ve never regretted it.

Do you have any questions I can try to answer about this amazing tool? If you’ve used it, do you have any comments to share? Maybe you can tell me about a feature I haven’t tried yet!

**I purchased Scrivener at the full retail price and I am posting this blog without the knowledge or permission of Literature and Latte Ltd. I have not received any promotional discounts or other compensation in exchange for my opinion of the product. It is simply something I use and enjoy.

On Writing: The End

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Yes, the rumors are true. I finished my book this week. I’m just going to stop for a moment and celebrate the fact that I have actually written an entire book. It’s 112,000 words, so about the length of Twilight or The Golden Compass, and if you’ve read either of those stellar works of literature, well, good for you. Anyway, it’s a full-on, novel-length book, and I hope you can forgive me for feeling pretty pleased with myself.

After writing my last post about reaching 100,000 words, I struggled for several weeks to reach the ending I was aiming for. And then on Sunday, I got mad, gave up on that ending, and took a completely different direction. Two days later, I was writing furiously and suddenly I realized I was at the end. I’m not sure yet if I love it or hate it, or even if I’ll keep it, but for now, it works. It’s actually pretty good.

Now for the bad news.

While I was struggling through those last few chapters this month, I realized (thanks in part to input from friends who will remain nameless) that part of the problem with getting to the ending is that the middle of the book lags pretty badly. The story just sort of meanders along aimlessly for a few chapters and doesn’t really build to a good ending. So now that I’ve finished this draft, I’m going to take a deep breath and enjoy the feeling for a week or so, and then go back and rewrite most of the middle. Because yeah, I wrote a book, and there are good parts to it, and I really like the characters, but the story as a whole still isn’t very good. So, I’ll let it rest for a little bit and then it’ll be time to open it back up, rip it apart (again) and see what I can salvage from it this time.

Writing a book is definitely a learning experience for me. It’s not as though I’ve ever done this before. Yeah, I’ve written bits and pieces of various stories over the years, but an entire novel that carries one plot from the beginning through the end, that’s new. I’m still not very good at it, but I think I’m getting better. I’m enjoying the process, despite occasionally panicking and deciding that I hate my book and I can’t actually write and I’m wasting a whole lot of time and effort on a completely useless pursuit. It’s fun.

I appreciate all of you who have been asking how my book is going. It’s really sweet to know that there are people who actually care, or are curious, at least. No news yet on when anyone (except those nameless few) will actually get to read it, though. It still needs lots of work and lots of love from lots of people I haven’t met yet. But for today I’ll just say I wrote a book, and I’m pretty happy about that.